Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Kick “Meth Kid” Out

Recently, a woman called to talk about her son. She knew what she should do but doesn’t have the courage to do it.

“Jane” and her husband are professionals and successful in their fields. They live in a very expensive area and many people would assume they have a perfect life, but their 20 year old son lives in a guest house on their property and he is into meth. She knows he smokes it and sees people coming and going into the guest house at all hours. I asked why they tolerated this, and she said at least she knows where he is and he’s safe.

I remind people I’m not a therapist; I’m another parent looking at difficult situations. If someone asks me for my thoughts, I give them. She asked, and here’s my advice: kick him out.

She was shocked and asked how I could suggest such a harsh measure.

This kid isn’t “safe” and won’t be safe as long as he’s on heavy-duty drugs. Meth houses can blow up. He’s got people coming and going so it’s likely he’s dealing. She has a drugged-out kid, strung-out strangers on their property, and the possibility of a home explosion or police busting this kid.

I asked, "If you have a choice, would you prefer to kick him out or watch his descent into drugs and endure the probable disaster coming your way?" For me, the decision to kick the kid off the property is difficult, but it’s the better of the alternatives. And she’d heard similar advice from others.

You have to make a lot of difficult decisions as a parent, and this is one of those situations that should never be tolerated, no matter how harsh the alternative may be.

Do you have thoughts or experience in a similar situation? What happened? You’re welcome to comment confidentially.

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